Growing a family

Whilst I still don’t fully comprehend the reasons why, I’m now a father to two children.

I love them both equally. One of the questions I could never figure an answer out was – why have two?

I can’t really consider the full details as to why one has a second child, or a third. The first child is great, he is growing up to be a smart, and active child.

I pondered why would anyone have a second child if the first is so great. I never found any real answers. Personally, I’m the 3rd of 4 (maybe more) children.

I found my eldest sister to be dumb and overly bossy, giving out directions even when they made no sense.

I found my oldest brother to also be dumb, but having wild dreams – like being an airforce pilot. I look at common sense in society regularly, and I would hope our defense forces do not put someone like him in the front seat of anything with wings, even a female hygeine product.

My younger brother was intelligent, which flies right in the face of his father’s intelligence. He had difficulty maintaining a job, and the last I saw of him many years ago – he barely had teeth in his head and hadn’t improved despite his escape from my mother’s prison like conditions.

Myself – I was the intelligent one, so I was continually reminded. I would be the one sorting through the tenancy legal disputes, dealing with owners who protested bond refunds, reading through my mother’s xray, ultrasound, and CT scan reports so she understood.

I would be the one making sure they weren’t ripping themselves off, and doing what I could to ensure they didn’t send us broke. My reward for all of that was regular poundings over the head with a rolling pin if ANYTHING ever went wrong, so long as my sister said ‘it was his fault’. I remember suffering nose bleeds for a while, probably unrelated, the doctors didn’t seem overly concerned at the time.

I managed to escape that environment many years ago, with police assistance when they were called in about a domestic disturbance – because the stupid bitch was trying to hold me off at knife point. The story behind that? Because I didn’t feel like going into the backyard and was happy enough where I was.

In that environment, I had no money, and was rarely given anything more than $5 growing up, money wasn’t plenty, but it certainly wasn’t poor either – 4 of them on disability (Older sister and brother straight on disability because they ‘didn’t feel like working’.

I’m not sure how I can manage to grow a family when the history I have to base ‘family’ off is the environment described above. I have scars and memories that I’ll never get rid of because of that environment.

But, I am somehow managed to navigate those adverse conditions and arrive to where I am today – a father of two children. Both are healthy, the older isn’t stupid, isn’t overweight, and is respectable.

They aren’t the best behaved – the girl’s excuse is OK – she’s a newborn, the boy’s excuse might as well be “I didn’t do it”.

I find myself looking towards his future, and what’s best for him. Ideally, he’ll have some of the best conditions on this planet ready for him to thrive in as he desires. In saying that – the ethics and morals injections need to continue to ensure that he doesn’t take anything that is given to him and destroy it. He isn’t old enough to understand much of that though.

One of the reasons I think we have two children is it’s in our nature to grow, and despite being happy with one child, we may find ourselves enjoying raising two children as opposed to one.

I never identified myself as having children as young as I am, but then I also figure it’s far more fun when you are younger – you get to enjoy them more, compared to someone who is older and due for hip replacement / prostethic legs 🙂

I’m enjoying my job, it’s become a little more challenging since a few of the staff have moved to other areas, but I don’t really mind it – I’m enjoying where things are right now. I’m nearly enjoying the support aspect again, it’s good to resolve issues, but I can’t see myself enjoying it when your working one after the other.

I’ve worked with some customers to resolve issues over extended periods, and also assisted a manufacturer to fix an issue with one of their products, the customer behind that story is very happy with the outcomes (despite months of issues).

I concluded at some point recently, that there will always be issues, be it with the website or the IT systems we are left with to support. I think that’s largely because those who should be paying attention to detail on these areas simply aren’t, the people who do the development work don’t bother checking it – simply do what is asked and leave it – if it breaks, too bad.

I have a different attitude towards development, in that something should be tested, and any website changes should be proof read prior to the issue being put to bed. And of course, if something seems out of place, it doesn’t go live without such ‘go live’ being directed by those who are ultimately responsible anyway.

I’m still very keen on networking and VoIP technologies – I’d rather be out of this realm with regard to my resume at some point, otherwise I’ll be 30- 40 and still be seen as someone who is good for client support, networking and VoIP. I want to diversify that some more – but – family also shouldn’t suffer at the expense of that expansion too much.

Still, time will tell where everything is heading – still keen on buying a house soon too.


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